If you are the target of gossip:
1. Ask the news bearer to stop the gossiper from gossiping and ask the gossiper to come to you. Help the news bearer to be a gossip stopper with all the steps above.
2. Then ask for details and the exact words that were said behind your back, and facts, versus the news bearer's version of the facts.
In order to bond we need a common enemy, but it doesn't have to be a person, it can be an ideology or problem, eg; the behavior of the gossiper and not the gossiper as a whole person.
We often like to be a part of a group because we often feel superior as a group, but inferior as an individual.
What gets rewarded gets repeated. Don't reward the gossiper.
We overestimate our abilities and underestimate other people's abilities. When we see a flaw in others, we often blame the whole person, but when it comes to our own flaws we often say that was just a mistake. That's why we can contempt others.
How not to get hurt when you are the victim?
You can't control others, but you can control you and your feelings. The way you think dictates the way you feel.
You can ask the gossiper as to why they said what they said and welcome them to come directly to yourself. Help them stop gossiping. Steps are mentioned in the previous episode.
If you are the target of gossip:
1. Ask the news bearer to stop the gossiper from gossiping and ask the gossiper to come to you. Help the news bearer to be a gossip stopper with all the steps above.
2. Then ask for details and the exact words that were said behind your back, and facts, versus the news bearer's version of the facts.
In order to bond we need a common enemy, but it doesn't have to be a person, it can be an ideology or problem, eg; the behavior of the gossiper and not the gossiper as a whole person.
We often like to be a part of a group because we often feel superior as a group, but inferior as an individual.
What gets rewarded gets repeated. Don't reward the gossiper.
We overestimate our abilities and underestimate other people's abilities. When we see a flaw in others, we often blame the whole person, but when it comes to our own flaws we often say that was just a mistake. That's why we can contempt others.
How not to get hurt when you are the victim?
You can't control others, but you can control you and your feelings. The way you think dictates the way you feel.
You can ask the gossiper as to why they said what they said and welcome them to come directly to yourself. Help them stop gossiping. Steps are mentioned in the previous episode.